The Answer

I've finally heard the answer for myself. The answer that I couldn't quite bring myself to accept before. A fool perhaps.. For not being able to accept it the first time round? A fool perhaps.. For thinking that my presence could change some things? A fool perhaps.. For thinking too highly of myself? But I know, whatever it is, a fool I am.

Ouch.. this hurts. Badly. The pain brings me to the brink of taking a gun, pointing it at my head and pulling the trigger with no regrets. Ouch. I don't want to fall into another endless spiral of suicidal thoughts. Not again. Ouch. If only I could live on without a heart, I'd gladly do so right now. Ouch..